Author: Crystalusagi (crystalusagi@seiyausagi.net)

Lost - Part Three 
To Taiki's surprise, Seiya was not tearing up anything, unless 'anything' could be her insides. 
Oh yes, those were a jumbled mess. "We thought for sure you'd be tearing up furniture by 
now," Taiki said, trying to put a joking tone into her voice. It didn't work, because she was 
among the worst jokers in the world.  
Seiya was holding something, and it took her a moment to recognize it as a handkerchief. The 
piece of cloth was worn and tattered, and in certain spots the weave was so deteriorated that 
Seiya's skin showed through from the other side. For years, it had been the security blanket on 
those times when the past would bring a jolt to her friend, rendering her useless and unable to 
do anything but mourn the loss of a love. "It was from Tsukino-san, wasn't it?" Seiya didn't 
answer, and only rubbed her finger in small circles on the surface of the handkerchief lightly. 
She was still crying.  
"Tell me how to help," Taiki said softly.  
"Tell me where she is."  
Taiki stared at her friend, taking in a deep breath of air.  
"She asked to be left alone tonight, Seiya. We shouldn't-" She was interupted by Seiya's 
reignited anger.  
"I've asked to be left alone for six years, Taiki! But who's left me alone? No one. No one. Just 
when I thought I could forget, she was there. There in the alleyway, there with her sad eyes. 
And that asshole! He promised to protect her, but he's hurt her. He's the one that hurt her!" 
She was in a frenzy, and even the handkerchief couldn't keep her calm anymore. She picked 
up the new mattress, sheets and all, and lifted, flung, until it lay lopsided on the desk about six 
feet away. She continued to hurl things, and only when she started to punch at the walls, and 
her knuckles came away bruised and bloodied did the auburn-haired senshi step in. She took 
hold of Seiya, pulling her close, clamping her arms to her sides even as the other girl fought 
her. Eventually Seiya sagged in her arms. "I need to see her."  
She knew she shouldn't have, but then it was not her who had promised to keep the secret, to 
hide Usagi from Seiya. It was Kakyuu, and the Princess was busy with other problems, now. 
"The fourth tier, third door to the right." Seiya was out the door. 
The journey up the stairs was the longest she'd ever made in her life, with the exception of 
that voyage across the stars before they landed on the Earth that their Princess was hiding on. 
Her heart wanted to leap out of its resting place within her body, and it seemed every other 
internal organ was trying to follow suit. She was there, finally, in front of that door. She stood 
motionless before it, hardly breathing, and breathing too much all at the same time. It was as 
if she was trying to test how long a person could stay that way, hovering between joy and 
despair, between fear and anguish. She stood there, and willed herself to just knock. One 
knock. One solid knock upon the polished wood of that door, and she would be admitted into 
the heaven that housed that angel. One hard knock on the door and she would be met with 
rejection, with those sad, sad eyes running away from her forever. Again. She stood still.  
There was no time to further coax herself out of that apprehension; within a millisecond she 
heard the door creak open. A rush of air blew across her face as the door slid past her in a 
wide arc, nearly missing her nose. And there they were. Blue, blue eyes framed with dark 
lashes that stabbed at her heart with the sadness in them. They widened, those eyes, and she 
felt her heart drop and soar simultaneously. Usagi reached out to her, and she reached back. 
They held each other, tucked into each other's arms. She felt Usagi's small hands dig deep into 
her hair, seeking warmth there, though a fire roared at the fireplace. She felt the frail arms 
around her, clutching her tightly. And she felt tears seep through her shirt. 'She's not running 
now.' Usagi was mumbling something over and over again, but it was muffled by the shirt, 
muffled by their tears, muffled by the feeling that engulfed them both. She tried to hear, and 
when she finally heard, she hugged the younger girl tighter, closer to her, and wept. "So 
sorry...so sorry...so sorry..." Usagi sobbed over and over.  
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On another level of the palace, Kakyuu pushed the door to Yaten's bedroom chambers aside. 
The silver-haired woman was leaning on the balcony, staring at the star-studded sky, her face 
void of all emotion. Kakyuu walked silently to her, stopping just behind her under the cool 
autumn air. She did not speak. Slowly Yaten turned to face her, face still neutral. Only when 
the senshi was fully facing towards her did she see the dagger. It had been a prize of sorts, 
won in a battle between Yaten and another soldier from a visiting planet. The ambassador had 
been cocky and arrogant, and Yaten had lost her temper. It had been one of the few occasions 
that Kakyuu permitted her to do so, and when she acquired the other soldier's weapon and 
brought it up as an offering to her Princess, Kakyuu has told her that she deserved the prize. 
She was allowed to keep it.  
Now the silver dagger, its color matching that of Yaten's hair, was offered once more. This 
time it was with a lot more force. She took it. Yaten's expression was still blank, but her voice 
betrayed her; it was tight and all too frail at the same time. "If you cannot bear to even speak 
to me, or look at me..." she started, and the green eyes sparkled with tears. Her face was 
empty. "...If you cannot even treat me as you did before, then end it now." She closed her 
eyes, as if waiting for that final blow. She was already expecting it, and she wanted it. "If I 
can't even be a person to you, then why live at all? A friend's life means much, but what is a 
soldier to you, Princess?"  
She felt those soft hands on her face again, and the sweet scent that was Kakyuu drifted upon 
her like petals in the air. "I was scared," Kakyuu whispered, and Yaten knew she was close. 
Much too close, and not close enough. She opened her eyes a bit, and they were an inch apart. 
She felt the warmth of Kakyuu's breath on her as the Princess continued to speak. "I was 
scared that it would be wrong." Somewhere inside, Yaten's heart sank. But Kakyuu continued 
still. "I was scared, because I wasn't supposed to love my Protector. So many have done so 
and perished. So many before me, and both of them were destroyed." The dagger dropped. 
She was weeping silently, her face was now pressed against Yaten's, and she was more 
vulnerable than ever before. Yaten's arms folded around her, and they both held each other. 
"There will be a day when I will choose you over all else, Yaten. Then I will regret, and hate 
myself for it, and hate myself for hating it." She pulled away to look at Yaten. "I love you, 
Kou Yaten."  
Yaten said nothing, only reaching out again and pulling her close, bathing in that warmth, that 
light, trying to forget that the Princess was crying because of her. Still, she wanted this 
memory imprinted forever in her mind. Kakyuu was not crying for the planet, for the people, 
for Seiya or Taiki or any other person. She was crying for her. She planted a chaste kiss on the 
red hair. "I won't hate you."